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How to Build Confidence in Your Child with Dyslexia: A Parent's Step-by-Step Guide


Girl playing piano in a softly lit room, focused on sheet music. Wearing a white shirt with red dots. Calm and concentrating mood.

Watching your child struggle with reading and writing can break your heart. The frustration in their eyes when they can't decode words that their classmates read easily. The slumped shoulders when homework takes twice as long. The quiet "I'm just stupid" whispered when they think you can't hear.

A child with dyslexia faces unique challenges, but here's what many parents don't realise – confidence matters just as much as reading skills. Educational specialists have found that a child who believes in themselves will progress further than one who doesn't, regardless of their reading level.

"My daughter thought she wasn't smart until we helped her understand that dyslexia has nothing to do with intelligence," shares Maria, mother of 10-year-old Sophia. "Once she believed in herself, everything changed."

Research confirms what Maria discovered: children flourish when they understand their learning differences don't define their capabilities. Rather than pushing solely for higher grades, meaningful confidence grows when we connect children with activities where their natural talents shine.

The confidence journey begins right at home, with you. Small daily interactions shape how your child sees themselves. Through thoughtful support and celebration of their unique abilities, you can help your child develop the resilience needed to face challenges head-on.

This guide offers practical strategies you can start using today. You'll discover how to create a nurturing environment that builds genuine self-belief in your child with dyslexia – celebrating not just who they might become tomorrow, but who they wonderfully are today.

Understand What Confidence Means for Dyslexic Children

Picture this: your child beams with pride after building an incredible LEGO structure, but moments later crumples with shame when asked to read aloud. What's happening here? True confidence for dyslexic children runs deeper than occasional successes.

Confidence isn't just about getting good marks. For your dyslexic child, it's a delicate dance between how they see themselves, their daily school experiences, and whether they recognise their own unique gifts.

Why confidence looks different for every child

Have you noticed how differently your child experiences dyslexia compared to others? This isn't surprising. Dyslexia paints a different picture for each child, shaping how they understand themselves. Research warns that children with dyslexia face greater risks of developing negative self-perceptions, particularly about their academic abilities.

What does confidence actually look like? For shy Mia, it might be raising her hand in class despite the fear of spelling mistakes. For outgoing Ethan, perhaps it's proudly sharing his science project even though the written portion was challenging. Studies show dyslexic students who understand their unique learning profile—their personal pattern of strengths and challenges—develop stronger self-assurance.

Your child might struggle with reading yet show remarkable talent for solving complex puzzles. They might need extra time with spelling, yet possess extraordinary artistic vision. Recognising these individual patterns helps you nurture confidence where it matters most.

The link between self-worth and learning differences

Those first school years write powerful stories in your child's heart. Success breeds positive self-belief, while persistent struggles can leave children feeling small and powerless.

Think about the difference between confidence and self-esteem—they're connected but distinct. Confidence relates to your child believing they can succeed at specific tasks. Self-esteem runs deeper, touching whether they feel worthy of love and respect. Sadly, dyslexic children often face challenges with both.

"I got lucky this time," whispers the dyslexic child who earns a good mark. Yet when they struggle? "I'm just stupid." This harmful pattern appears repeatedly in research, with dyslexic children attributing success to chance rather than their own abilities. The results? Shocking statistics show 82.2% of dyslexic participants demonstrate low to very low overall self-esteem compared to just 16.7% in non-dyslexic groups.

Every red mark on a paper, every correction in front of classmates, adds up. Your child faces far more negative feedback than their peers. These experiences plant harmful seeds—thoughts like "I'll never be good at reading" or "I can't spell anything right". Left unchallenged, these beliefs take root in their identity.

Hope shines through, though. Children receiving a proper diagnosis and understanding show significant improvements in self-esteem. The key? Helping your child see that dyslexia doesn't reflect their intelligence—it simply means their magnificent brain processes information differently.

Create a Safe Emotional Environment at Home

The kitchen table transforms into a battlefield over homework. Tears fall onto worksheets. Pencils snap in frustration. Sound familiar?

Your home serves as a sanctuary or a stress zone for your dyslexic child. The emotional atmosphere you create fundamentally shapes whether your child will dare to try difficult things, push through challenges, and ultimately believe in themselves.

"We completely changed how we responded to homework struggles," shares David, father of 9-year-old Jacob. "Once we focused on making home emotionally safe first, Jacob started taking more risks with his reading. He knows struggling doesn't mean failing here."

Listen without judgement

Have you noticed how your child's words sometimes hide deeper feelings? When your child mumbles "This reading is stupid" while staring at their worksheet, they're likely saying "I feel inadequate" or "I'm afraid I can't do this."

Authentic listening happens heart-to-heart, not just ear-to-ear. When frustration erupts, place your mobile face down, close your laptop, and turn your full attention to your child. Perhaps kneel to their eye level, creating that invisible bridge of connection that says, "You matter more than anything else right now."

Let your child's words tumble out at their own pace. Your patient silence creates sacred space for their thoughts to form. When Jamie stammers trying to explain why he hates reading groups at school, resist completing his sentences—even when the words seem stuck. This patience whispers, "Your thoughts deserve time."

After they've shared, mirror back what you've heard: "It sounds like you felt embarrassed when Ms. Thompson asked you to read aloud. That must have been really difficult." If you're not quite sure whether they're feeling sad or angry, make your best guess—"Are you feeling disappointed?"—your child will guide you if you've missed the mark.

Respond to negative self-talk with affirming language

Listen for those heartbreaking phrases: "I'm so stupid," "Everyone's smarter than me," or "I'll never learn this." These aren't just words—they're beliefs taking root.


When eight-year-old Sophia declared, "I'm rubbish at reading!" her mother gently responded, "Reading feels really hard right now, doesn't it? That doesn't mean you're rubbish at it—it means your amazing brain works differently. Remember how you figured out that complicated Lego set when nobody else could?"

Help your child separate themselves from difficult thoughts. Practice transforming "I can't read" into "Reading is tricky for me, but I'm learning new strategies." When "I'm the worst speller ever" emerges, guide them toward "Spelling challenges me, but I'm getting better at using my tools."

When frustration boils over into tears or anger, acknowledge those feelings first: "I see you're really upset. This is difficult work. Your brain is working so hard right now." Then offer perspective: "Your brain has an extraordinary way of thinking—it's why you notice patterns nobody else sees."

Remember—emotions aren't separate from learning; they're the foundation. Creating emotional safety isn't a fluffy extra—it's absolutely essential for your child's confidence and academic growth.

Use Everyday Routines to Build Confidence in Your Child with Dyslexia

Morning toast. Bedtime stories. Weekend walks. The ordinary rhythm of family life holds extraordinary power for dyslexic children. These everyday moments—far from the pressure of classrooms—create perfect opportunities for confidence to take root and flourish.

"The biggest changes happened during our normal day," explains Lynn, whose 11-year-old son Thomas struggled with confidence. "Not during special tutoring sessions or interventions, but during breakfast chats and car journeys. Those small daily moments added up to something remarkable."

Praise effort, not outcome

Your dyslexic child likely puts in twice the effort for half the recognition. While classmates breeze through spelling tests, your child battles each word with determination few will ever understand.

What happens when we shift from "Well done getting 80%" to "I saw how you studied those words using three different techniques—that shows incredible problem-solving"? Everything changes.

Watch your child's face when you say, "The way you tackled that difficult word shows real persistence." Their eyes light up differently than when you simply acknowledge correct answers. This isn't just kind parenting—it's strategic confidence-building backed by research showing children develop stronger self-belief when adults acknowledge their process rather than just results.

Your words plant seeds of resilience. Try these effort-focused phrases during everyday moments:

  • "I noticed how you kept trying different strategies to spell that word even when it was frustrating"

  • "The way you concentrated on your reading for those full 10 minutes shows remarkable dedication"

  • "I'm impressed by how you spotted and corrected that mistake yourself—that takes real attention"

Let your child make small decisions


"Would you like to read before or after your bath tonight?" "Should we practise spelling with magnetic letters or with the whiteboard?" "Which two chores would you like to be responsible for this week?"

These seemingly minor choices lay golden bricks on the path to confidence. Many dyslexic children feel constantly directed—told what to read, how to spell, when to focus. Offering controlled choices returns power to their hands.

Sarah, age 9, blossomed when her parents involved her in creating her homework routine. "I know I need to do it right after my snack, or I get too tired," she explained. This simple insight—being trusted to understand her own learning needs—transformed homework from a battleground to a manageable task.

Household responsibilities offer similar opportunities. When your child successfully manages the recycling sorting or prepares the family pets' meals, they build evidence of their capability beyond academic skills.

Children who regularly make decisions develop stronger problem-solving approaches. Most importantly, they learn to trust their own judgment—a crucial skill for navigating learning differences.

Celebrate small wins regularly

For many children, progress comes in leaps. For dyslexic children, it often arrives in tiny steps that others might miss. Your recognition of these moments matters more than you know.

Did your child:

  • Remember a tricky spelling rule they'd previously struggled with?

  • Push through frustration to finish a challenging paragraph?

  • Use a new strategy without prompting?

  • Ask for help instead of giving up?

These victories deserve celebration—not with expensive gifts or elaborate praise, but with genuine recognition. A special handshake, a quick text to Grandma sharing the achievement, or simply a moment of specific acknowledgment: "I remember when that type of word was really difficult for you—now look at how you tackled it!"

A sticker chart on the refrigerator. A quick photograph of completed work. A weekly "wins" conversation at Sunday dinner. These simple traditions create a family culture where progress—not perfection—receives attention.

Remember to measure your child against their own journey, not against classmates or siblings. This personal measuring stick nurtures authentic confidence that withstands challenges both inside and outside the classroom.

Encourage Strengths and Interests Beyond School

Your child's face lights up as he shows you the intricate model aeroplane he built—every piece carefully connected, painted with remarkable attention to detail. The same child who struggles to read a paragraph has just demonstrated exceptional spatial reasoning and fine motor skills.

Life extends far beyond classroom walls. For dyslexic children, this truth offers precious breathing room and vital confidence-building opportunities. The playground, the art studio, the sports field—these become sanctuaries where dyslexic minds often flourish spectacularly.

Explore hobbies that build self-belief

"My son felt like a failure every day at school until he joined robotics club," shares Teresa, whose 12-year-old discovered his talent for engineering. "Suddenly, the same brain that struggled with spelling was solving complex mechanical problems none of his peers could figure out. His entire self-image transformed."

Research confirms Teresa's observation—extracurricular activities create crucial success opportunities outside formal learning environments, particularly valuable for children facing academic challenges.


Watch carefully for your child's natural gravitational pulls. Do their eyes sparkle when building with LEGO? Perhaps they become completely absorbed when drawing or painting? Maybe they invent elaborate stories but struggle to write them down? These natural interests often reveal hidden strengths waiting to flourish.


Worthy explorations might include:

  • Coding clubs where algorithmic thinking matters more than spelling

  • Drama groups where dyslexic children often excel at memorising lines and expressing emotion

  • Science experiments that tap into their superior pattern recognition

  • Photography classes that harness their unique visual perspective


Remember—enjoyment trumps achievement every time. Research shows that activities children genuinely love build confidence regardless of competitive success. The chess club where your child feels comfortable thinking deeply matters more than the trophy-winning team that causes anxiety.


Support non-academic talents like art or sport


The arts offer dyslexic children a language beyond words. Many renowned artists, designers and musicians have dyslexia—not coincidentally, but precisely because their brains process information differently.


Eleven-year-old Mia struggled with reading but discovered pottery, where her exceptional three-dimensional thinking created works that astounded her teacher. "Clay doesn't care about spelling," she wisely observed. Through her art, Mia developed confidence that gradually extended into academic areas.


Sports similarly provide rich territory for dyslexic children to shine. Physical activities not only help release the frustration that often accompanies learning differences, but they also place dyslexic children on equal footing with peers. The football pitch doesn't demand reading fluency; the swimming pool doesn't require perfect spelling.


"Basketball became my son's sanctuary," explains Martin, father of 14-year-old James. "His spatial awareness made him an exceptional player, and for the first time, classmates were asking him for help rather than the other way around."


Art therapists have documented how creative pursuits help dyslexic children process their experiences and develop positive self-image. Similarly, sports psychologists note that physical activities create "equalising environments" where dyslexic children learn teamwork, resilience and healthy competitive spirit alongside their peers.


These pursuits reveal a profound truth to your child: dyslexia brings remarkable gifts alongside its challenges. The same brain that struggles with decoding text often excels at seeing patterns, imagining solutions, and thinking outside conventional boundaries—precisely the qualities our complex world desperately needs.


Conclusion


The school concert hall falls silent as Emma steps onto the stage. Three years ago, she couldn't read music and refused to join the choir, believing dyslexia made her "too stupid" for music. Tonight, she sings with confidence that brings tears to the eyes of the audience. What changed? Not her dyslexia, but her belief in herself.


Your child's journey with dyslexia will have its rough patches—frustrating homework sessions, tear-stained worksheets, and moments of self-doubt. Yet within this journey lies extraordinary possibility.


Building genuine confidence requires steadfast commitment to understanding, boundless patience, and joyful celebration of their unique abilities. Above all, we must help our children grasp this fundamental truth: dyslexia isn't a flaw to overcome but simply a different—and often brilliant—way of processing the world.


The small daily acts matter profoundly. Creating that emotionally safe harbour at home where mistakes are welcomed as learning opportunities. Praising determined effort rather than perfect outcomes. Discovering those magical activities where your child's natural talents shine brightly.


When Mia realised her remarkable spatial reasoning wasn't coincidental but connected to her dyslexic mind, everything shifted. "My brain isn't broken—it's just wired differently," she told her mother. This powerful realisation—that dyslexia brings gifts alongside challenges—forms the cornerstone of resilient confidence.


Your child's path won't follow straight, predictable lines. Their journey may wander through unexpected landscapes and discover hidden talents. With your unwavering support and understanding, they'll develop not just confidence to face academic challenges, but something far more valuable—the self-belief to embrace their unique way of thinking as the tremendous asset it truly is.


Remember, you're not just raising a reader. You're raising a thinker, a problem-solver, a person who sees patterns others miss. The world desperately needs these distinctive minds—and it all begins with the confidence you help build today.

 
 

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Written by Bernadette Haigh
Bernadette Haigh is the Founder of Daring Dyslexic and host of the Doing Dyslexia Differently Podcast. She is on a mission to redefine what it means to grow up with dyslexia. Bernadette offers a fresh and unique perspective by focusing on mindset, confidence, and self-esteem – areas she knows all too well impact a person's potential long after conquering their academic challenges. You can find Bernadette on Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube and her podcast on Spotify, and other great players.

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